Just the other day, I had some lovely surprises waiting in my comment section. Steph, of We Don’t Chew Glass and Maurnas, of Cursitivity both nominated me for blogging awards!  I’m pretty thrilled about the nominations…because it means that someone is actually reading my blog and they don’t think it totally sucks! Instead of an acceptance speech, each award comes with its own set of questions and requests:

The “One Lovely Blog Award” asks me to tell you seven things about myself:

1) I was a radio disc jockey for 16-years

2) I have four, fabulous pretty much grown up kids and one totally terrific two-year-old granddaughter. I wasn’t thrilled about being a grandmother because I’m WAY too young — but I was actually in the delivery room when she was born and immediately fell in love with her.

3) I often have a strong desire to get into my car and just drive and drive, stopping when I run out of money and doing odd jobs to make my way. I do realize this would be much more fun if I was independently wealthy and didn’t have to do odd jobs to survive.

4) I’m a control freak — I’ve often thought that if I was made Supreme Goddess of the Universe and everyone had to do what I said, the world would be a much more organized and pleasant place to live.

5) I do not have a green thumb. I try and try to grow plants, but I’ve turned into some sort of typhoid Mary of the plant world — a plant plague, if you will.

6) I used to be a competitive swimmer — I wasn’t very good.

7) I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.

For the Liebster Award, I was asked the following questions:

1)      How long have you been blogging?

I started blogging in August of 2013 — I’m still pretty much a baby blogger. Not that I blog about babies, because I don’t.  Mind you, I don’t have anything AGAINST babies…they are sort of nice when they aren’t crying or pooping. What I am TRYING to say is that I’m just a relatively new blogger and I don’t know much (but I think by now that is pretty obvious).

2)      What inspired you to start your blog?

My daughter gave me Jenny Lawson’s book, which I loved. I didn’t know her as a blogger – quite frankly, I didn’t read blogs at the time (unless I happened to hit one while searching for a recipe). Once I discovered the world of blogging and started reading, I was hooked. But I never really thought about starting my own until I started telling my coworkers stories about myself and they found them funny. Then I thought, “I should start blogging – because then I can publish my memoirs and be rich and famous!” See, I told you I know next to nothing about the blogging world.

3)      What is your favorite color?

I love jewel tones – emerald green, vivid teal, cobalt blue, vibrant purple, beautiful fuchsia and deep, ruby-colored magenta. I can’t pick just one.

4)      What is your all-time favorite movie?

The Shawshank Redemption…

I guess it comes down to a simple choice really, get busy living or get busy dying.

I’m not big on prison movies in general, but I loved the fact that Andy, who was innocent of any crime, managed not to let the horrible unfairness of his situation break him. I especially loved that he was able to make sure the truly corrupt warden paid for his crimes. And I thought it was marvelous that he was able to make a new, wonderful life for himself and he made sure his friend, Red, was able to join him in the end.

5)      When do you typically work on your blog?

I often write posts during downtime at work (shhhh…don’t tell my boss!). I occasionally wake up at 3am and cannot go back to sleep – that is prime time for writing, as there are no distractions.

6)      Coffee, tea, or neither?

Neither. If you’ve read some of my earlier blog posts, you know that I was raised by some devout Mormons – and they don’t drink coffee, so I never developed a fondness for it. Hmmm…it occurs to me after reading that sentence that I made it sound like I was kidnapped by some strange devout Mormons who raised me as their own. That is NOT the case – the devout Mormons were my parents…and they weren’t strange…well, not very strange. Also, all of my children now drink coffee – I’m not sure how that happened.

As for tea, my mother made me drink some tea once when I was sick – I’m sure it was to help settle my stomach, but it just made me vomit. I just can’t stomach the stuff – no matter if it is black, green, herbal, whatever. What I DO drink is Coke or Pepsi (I’m not terribly brand loyal – if it is a cola product, with full sugar and caffeine, I’m on board).

Ahhhhhhh!

I think cola is the nectar of the Gods – and the Gods punish me with horrible headaches if I try to give up my cola habit.

7)      Is writing a career or a hobby for you?

I do get paid for writing, kind of. I freelance for a company where I used to work as an editorial assistant. They publish a database of abstracts from scholarly journals and it’s my job to find those abstracts or, if none exists, to read the article and write one myself. I don’t make enough to get myself a little cottage on a beach somewhere, but it’s a start.

My blog is a hobby, for now (see answer to question #2, re: rich and famous).

8)      What do you love most in this world?

My kids and granddaughter are WHO I love most in this world, but since this question asks “what” the answer would be reading…and eating. Those two things are probably equal – but eating would win if I didn’t have to worry about gaining weight.

9)      Can you share something that you have learned recently?

I don’t think a day goes by where I don’t learn SOMETHING. I’m always interested in learning new things…basically so I can beat my daughter when we watch Jeopardy. The most interesting thing I learned recently was how to make fused glass jewelry. I’m kind of in love with it now – but not so much that it would replace eating or reading (see answer #8)

10)    Where is your favorite place to shop online?

There was a time, not to long ago, when my favorite online store was Augason Farms . Basically, they sell all sorts of dried, canned food for the apocalypse. Since I come from Mormon stock and because I love eating (see answer #8), it is important to my peace of mind to have copious amounts of food on hand…just in case.

The Zombies might come, but I’m still having my dessert!

Recently, I have been spending a lot of time at Kobo. They come out with coupons fairly often, which allows me to buy books for my e-reader at less than outrageous prices — because I love reading (see answer #8), this is important to my sanity.

11) What is your biggest pet peeve?

People talking down to me — being condescending, patronizing, or fake. I hate to break it to you assholes, but I’m not five years old. I’m a grown-up, intelligent, generally sensible woman who doesn’t need a douchebag like you telling me how I should 1) work, 2) live, or 3) feel.

It occurs to me I should probably make it clear that the when I say “you” assholes and douchebags I’m not taking about YOU — because you are witty, creative, sassy, and a little bit bitchy sometimes, which I like. And if you’re reading my blog, you get me…and I appreciate that.