19 Responses

  1. Michelle
    Michelle May 5, 2015 at 8:10 pm | | Reply

    This is gorgeous and haunting. I get it with the gifts..I mostly don’t care, but gifts given with thought behind them are the best kind…the cost of them is meaningless.

  2. lrconsiderer
    lrconsiderer May 5, 2015 at 11:59 pm | | Reply

    I get it…we used to get one another ‘I love you’ gifts, which might be notebooks, or coasters made out of computer parts, or candies, or a mug to replace a smashed favourite…the monetary value was irrelevant but the thought factor was priceless.

    Then he started getting me gifts which weren’t so thoughtful, and we couldn’t really afford or didn’t have a point, and I think they were placatory.

    He took his ring off first, though, and I guess I’m lucky cos I didn’t have long enough to get long-term dents.

  3. Kristine @ MumRevised
    Kristine @ MumRevised May 6, 2015 at 7:20 am | | Reply

    Gifts are so important! My husband is very thoughtful, surprisingly so. We are celebrating our 20th this year (apparently in 20 weeks). He started giving me a gift representing each year every Friday. He even got the kids involved. He wins this round! My little photo album seems to pale… we are both still wearing our rings. Thanks for sharing Jana.

  4. Spoken Like A True Nut
    Spoken Like A True Nut May 6, 2015 at 3:34 pm | | Reply

    Bittersweet but wonderfully told. My husband and I are all about the “saw this and thought of you” gifts, and I hope we always will be. I received enough overpriced generic flowers in prior relationships to never want to see a rose again.

  5. Aussa Lorens
    Aussa Lorens May 7, 2015 at 6:27 pm | | Reply

    This made me feel a bit sobby (if that’s a word) in my chest. But it was beautifully expressed.

    And! I know you kick ass at giving gifts, as evidenced by the storytelling goat you sent me 🙂 So amazing.

  6. Sandy Ramsey
    Sandy Ramsey May 12, 2015 at 8:01 pm | | Reply

    Oh, Jana. I don’t even know how to explain how this one made me feel but I do know it will be difficult to forget.

    I know I always prefer gifts from the heart. My husband has managed a few times to really catch me off guard and brought me to tears. That is the best,

  7. Samara
    Samara May 13, 2015 at 6:34 am | | Reply

    I really wanted my Ex’s gifts to be something that I actually liked, so I was into the “I point and you pay” method. His sisters told me I was being rude; that I should just be excited for whatever he got me. But what was the point of him spending money, whatever the amount, on things I didn’t want, would never use, or would never wear?

    This is a beautifully written, bittersweet story. Thank you, Jana, for sharing these little pieces of yourself with us.

  8. kayjcee2014
    kayjcee2014 May 28, 2015 at 8:53 pm | | Reply

    Your post made me thing of an article i saw once about the different kinds of love languages. Like some people show & respond to gifts that are more doing actual things for someone or as a gift for them, others like gifts to show and tell, etc. and it can really help if you understand what a person’s love language is. Mine and my ex’s were totally different. He never understood that I loved when he would bring me home a sweet tea from Sonic just because he knew i liked it, small stuff tlike that, like you picking up your’s favorite gum. While he liked to give me bigger, showier presents-things he could tell people about. I just never seemed to give him anything that was grand enough to brag on.

    My solution to the ring indention dilemna was to get me an inexpensive ring. It looks nothing like an engagement or wedding ring. It is a tree of life, i think they called it. It represents earth, family and heaven. i thought it kind of symbolized my new start!

If you don't comment, then I'm just talking to myself -- and I do too much of that already.

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